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ellyhelcl

Elly Helcl

Underworld Lover (Guardian Angel #2) - Sharon  Hamilton This had the potential to be an incredible story. It had the potential to be a highly erotic, otherworldly tale...Instead we got this...

"He bent her over at the waist, then kneeled in front of her peach, hanging ripe, glistening with wetness from her juices."

Erm....What?...That wasn't exactly the erotic image I would have been shooting for...nor can I even begin to comprehend how a woman's...well...parts, could ever be described as "hanging ripe"...maybe her breasts but her nether regions?...The image that conjures up in my mind is not sexy or erotic...it is scary!

Moving on...

The Heroine...Melanie
She is an ultra sweet girl with rich parents who are not very nice people...she is of course, a virgin...and she, of course, drops into bed with the hero almost immediately.
She is such a bland, vanilla mary-sue. Melanie is a hot potato between the sheets but is a modest virgin by day? Or something like that.

Let's add to my confusion...
Melanie's dead boyfriend committed suicide but saved her at the last moment and becomes a dark angel...his teacher(?) see's Melanie and instantly falls in love with her...and the bad guy see's Melanie and wants her for himself...but, there really isn't anything special about this girl in the book...so, this normal girl just happens to attract every man she meets? Or what?

The Hero...Josh...hung like a horse
Hard as steel bad guy who is in the business of talking people into committing suicide...he collects souls for hell...but he see's Melanie, instantly falls in love, and wants her to remain a human?
For someone who has spent hundreds of years talking people into killing themselves in front of him...this man is a real softy and doesn't fit the image the author tries to create...it just isn't believable.

The badguy...Peter...is described as having a peter that is the size of an average woman's thumb...
He also suffers from premature ejaculation and cries in bed about it.
HE IS THE BAD GUY!!!! There is a sex scene that lasts for an ENTIRE CHAPTER...and how on earth can you get all worked up over a man with an itty bitty weenie? Who cries after he prematurely ejaculates?

Some chapters just didn't fit in this book, something's were done horribly...The big bang ending? Destroyed by this author...completely and totally shredded.


SO....this book did get three stars...After everything said above, why?

Because even with all the bad, it was a mostly enjoyable story. That in itself earned it one star.
Two, the author managed to give everyone a HEA. Half a star added...
Three, When the book finally got interesting, it was really good...Another half a star.
Four...It was a good idea that if worked over properly could be a fabulous idea...Good enough to be made into a movie that would rock. (and those movie theater effects that I COULD imagine gave it an extra boost of a star).

In it's current condition, I would say only read this book if you like mary/marty sues. Some people are really happy with them and happy with stories that are predictable...that isn't the case for me.